Most of us expect to have a few all-nighters during our undergraduate years. However, for a small sect of Hoyas, the all-nighter is the rule and not the exception.
These “frequent-flyers” (or “repeat offenders”, depending on whom you ask) are rarely seen in the light of day. They observe a hidden code, douse themselves in all manner of caffeine, and are the sole witnesses to campus in the dwindling hours of the night. These are their stories.
In the Beginning
An all-nighter is rarely planned. For many, it’s a last resort, a painful reminder of the college student’s perennial struggle with procrastination. Therefore, the all-nighter begins with a simple recognition: no, sleep will not be had tonight.
While this may seem like a somewhat minor epiphany, it serves as a powerful motivator. “How noble,” the mind assures itself, “Putting the importance of one’s studies before such temporal pleasures like comfort and sleep.”
The first stage of an all-nighter is characterized by steady confidence. You comfort yourself with the thought of the sheer amount of time you have. “Eighteen hours until class!” you announce triumphantly, as if entire empires have been built in less time.
With the momentous task still ahead, the night will then begin with an impressive amount of planning and preparation: notecards will be organized, coffee ordered, laptop charged, and snacks prepared. And tastefully arranged. These sacred measures have their place in the ritual, but ultimately, offer little solace against the mounting sense of despair.
In the (Actual) Beginning
About 2.5 hours into the night, the first word appears. Though this word rarely lasts into the next few minutes (let alone make into the final version), it’s something concrete (at last!). It connects the writer to the vast white emptiness of the page before him.
Indeed, based on the strength of the first word alone, this could be the greatest paper in the world. The first word may even spur others in quick succession, but rest assured, any confidence is short-lived. After reading back the first sentence, the whole thing is deleted. So it begins again.
So Late, It’s Early
Another hour, and there is a meaty introduction, and something vaguely resembling a first paragraph. As one nears the end of the first page, we enter a crucial stage of the all-nighter: delusions of grandeur.
“On to the second page, and it’s only 2 AM! And it’s actually good – wait – it’s great! In fact, this may well be the best darn paper on Tibetan Buddhism ever written!” The paper will not only be graded A+, it will be published and reopen the field.
The professor will tell tales of the time he had you, the great Tibetan Scholar, in his class. This very desk on the fourth floor of Lauinger will inevitably become a sacred pilgrimage, visited by his Holiness, the Dalai Lama, himself. You will be lauded as the James Joyce of the Far East. You award yourself a well-earned 5 minutes of Facebook.
By now, it’s 4 AM, and those 5 minutes have turned into 67. A second page follows the first, and, just like that, a paper seems to have materialized before you. You take a quick look around the empty library, but it offers no comfort to the piercing loneliness one feels when alone in the wee hours of the morning.
The End
Hunter S. Thompson, no stranger to the all-nighter, once said, “anybody with a terminally jangled lifestyle needs at least one psychic anchor every twenty-four hours – mine is breakfast.” And so, as the sun begins to come up, you trudge to Uncommon Grounds for some orange juice, a coffee, and what will be the most satisfying muffin you can possibly remember.
You swear and promise that you will never, ever, under any circumstances do this again, and now that the paper is finished everything will be all right. The world is perfect right now. And as you glance at your watch, you realize – class started 5 minutes ago.
Finals are upon us. Happy all-nighter season.
Featured image from Red Orbit.
Dan Marrow (COL ’15) is the Senior Managing Editor of Behind the Counter. He is convinced that nothing good ever happens before 2 AM.